A proscuating attorney has the defendant on the stand.

He states, On the night of August 16th didn't you attack your wife with a hammer and beat her?

A biker from the rear of the court room stands up and cusses out the defendant.

The judge tells the biker to sit down and to shut up.

The proscuter continues, Also on the same night didn't you attack your son and stab him with a screwdriver?

The biker jumps up again and calls the defendant every thing in the book.

The judge tells the biker, "Before you are evicted from court, I'm curious, are you related to the victims?"

The biker says, "No" But then points to the defendant and yells, "That jerk is my neighbor. When I was working on the Harley, I asked him if I could borrow some tools and the scumbag said he didn't have any."

well why didn't the biker have any?

He was a new harley owner, Had not been broke in yet...

Thats cause his new Harley hadn't been broke.

well why didn't the biker have any?

Harley riders of today don't need any tools, wouldn't know what to do with them if they had any.
They all take their bikes down to the local Harley dealer / t-shirt emporium to get them fixed...even oil changes.
It's true...the good ol biker days are gone. That menacing outlaw gaining on you in your rear view mirror might be your dentist:D

Or my Son-In-Law!!!! :p

Or my Son-In-Law!!!! :p

Didn't know you had an outlaw son-in-law Kdub.

Bought my first new Harley in 1975. AMF owned them then, they made better bowling balls...trust me!
Spent many happy hours takin candy away from babies, practicing my surly look and other heinous crimes.
Needed to be able to look good rollin.....and broke down on the side of the road :D Memories huh!

Should give the forum Harley riders some ammo to shoot back at me with.
Switched over to HO HO Honda a few years ago. Most of my friends still ride Hardleys...I hear it all.
What kinda mileage do ya get on rice?
Does Santa know his bike is missing?
And my favorite: Did you know the color of your bike matches them bloodshot eyes?

http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e153/Lumberjak/Picturebike004.jpg

Bought my first Harley in 1978. It was a 1968,67,69... In a basket. I was 19. One of the best learning experiances of my life. I've had one most of the last 30 years. No regrets. I don't give a rip what ya ride, long as there's bugs in your teeth!

...even oil changes.
You don't need to change the oil in a Harly, the PUKE so much that you just add more! it never has a chance to get dirty!
Every one knows that the only thing that PUKES more than a Harly is a Detroit!

Thats a beautiful Valkyrie, Lumberjak


http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa115/mattsbox99/IMG_0362.jpg

my uncle had an old harley for thrity years and finally told his wife adn parents on the day that he was married, i think he might have gotten rid of it though :mad:

What is the difference between a Harley Davidson Motor Cylce and a vacuum cleaner?





The dirt bag is located differently.

Guess once again I'm in the minority here.

Rode rice since I was 15. About 14 years ago bought my first harley and still have the low rider I bought new in '95. The same year sold my Kawasaki, I've never looked back. I've owned up to five at one time but now down to two of 'em.

The ones that leak all over aren't mine. Have an ex-police bike that was bought with 11,500 miles and has over 100k on it without the valve covers being off.

[QUOTE=MontyF]Guess once again I'm in the minority here.

Not sure you're in the minority MontyF, everybody has or wants a Harley these days. That's part of the reason I got away from them. Too many people runnin down to buy a big piece of image or live an outlaw dream...just drove the prices up. The brand don't make the man, never did, never will.

I remember the old Harley dealerships. Smelled like oil, wasn't exactly hospital clean but they sold a few scooters along with lots of parts. Counter talk was about solid lifters, "A" grind cams and some new dangerous belt drive that "Spider" was installing. Counter talk now is funny. "Does the "I'll kill you" t-shirt come in extra fat? Where are the new Harley boots, the ones with side zippers? Does the chain drive wallet come with a matching key ring? Would you mind putting that cigar out ( though we love to sell these 2 wheel death traps to these bozos who can't ride) we are health conscious and this is a smoke free zone.

Everyone knows that Harley is an Icon, (whatever that means) an American legend. They're like a time machine back to the pioneer days. Imagine if you will a couple of hundred years ago. People left their homes and headed out across this vast country. They didn't know if they would make it or not. Kinda the same today on a Harley, you just don't know if you'll make it or not :D

Ok boys, I've had my fun....all tongue in cheek.

mattsbox99, thanks for the kind words, looks like someone left a shiny toy on your driveway...I like that paint.

Wrench Man, you should be a poet. You managed to kick Harley Davidson and General Motors all in the same sentence, almost. Have poured a gallon or two of black gold in a Detroit myself. (GMC General with a 5 and a 4) Oh, the old Harleys didn't leak as much as you might think. Before the rubber band drive, they had a "drip" oiler to lube the chain. After a couple hundred miles, oil pretty well covered the underside, made a real mess. Best fix was cut off the oiler and use spray chain lube.

RDKNG, you are of course correct. Don't matter what you ride but would rather skip the bugs in my teeth. Windshield catches most but a sneaky one gets by on occasion, usually hit my wife though :p

Once again, to be fair and give the Harley riders some ammo. Harley has the best resale in the business and they make some of the best gear. My rain suit is HD, across the back in big black letters, Harley Davidson, guess that's why people often tell me at stop lights, "nice Harley man"....even though the engine looks like it came out of an airplane, not even close to a V twin.

Boy - Did this thread ever get hijacked!!!!! :eek:

Lumberjak-

I painted it myself, first time painting anything... mine isn't a harley either, not that I would want one (ok I'd like a V-Rod). Mine is a Suzuki Marauder 800, its got some goodies, dyno'd at 115 RWHP.

It ain't been hijacked till someone ask for a groundhog recipe...


got one?

This dang thread leaked oil all over my computer.